Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
