I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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