think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
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