you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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