this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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