its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
