and you said cock pushups were impossible
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
