We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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