I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
