I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Don't EVER smell your tampon
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
