I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
