I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
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