PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
