I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize