guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Randomize
