Already got asked if we're dating
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Randomize
