I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
