Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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