I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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