Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
