Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
