Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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