The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
