Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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