I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
