boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
