Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
