it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
