is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
