I accidentally had phone sex last night
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
