all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
