My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
