Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
i think im in europe. pls send help
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
