i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
