this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
Randomize
