How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
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