Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
