you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
