i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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