That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
You know you're baked when you feel your throat closing up from an allergic reaction to the pecans in the cookie you're eating but you keep eating the damn cookie.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
