you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
