i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
