Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
A+ Viking dick
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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