can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
