..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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