operation harelip BJ is a go
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
high people should be assigned attendants
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Randomize
