she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
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