Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
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