if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
you will always have a special place in my vag
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize