At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Randomize
