my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I am available for nakedness
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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