pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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